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Rock Spectacle
by Barenaked Ladies
ALBUM RANKINGS:
Ratings and rankings are based on all available critic reviews and awards.
Overall Rating:
3.1498
Avg. Critic Score:
3.3500
Rock Spectacle Lyrics
Lyrics
Disc
Track
Title
- Drove downtown in the rain nine-thirty on a Tuesday night,
- just to check out the late-night record shop.
- Call it impulsive, call it compulsive, call it insane,
- but when I'm surrounded I just can't stop.
- It's a matter of instinct, it's a matter of conditioning,
- it's a matter of fact.
- You can call me Pavlov's dog.
- Ring a bell and I'll salivate. How'd you like that?
- Dr. Lendy tell me you're not just a pedagogue,
- cause right now I'm
- Chorus
- Lying in bed just like Brian Wilson did
- Well I'm lying in bed just like Brian Wilson did.
- So I'm lying here, just staring at the ceiling tiles.
- and I'm thinking about what to think about.
- Just listening and relistening to Smiley Smile,
- and I'm wondering if this is some kind of created drought
- because I am
- Chorus
- And if you want to find me I'll be out in the sandbox,
- wondering where the hell all the love has gone.
- Playing my guitar and building castles in the sun,
- and singing ";Fun, Fun, Fun.";
- Chorus
- I had a dream that I was three hundred pounds
- and though I was very heavy,
- I floated 'til I couldn't see the ground
- I floated 'til I couldn't see the ground
- Somebody help me, I couldn't see the ground
- Somebody help me, I couldn't see the ground
- Somebody help me because I'm
- Chorus
- Drove downtown in the rain nine-thirty on a Tuesday night.
- Just to check out the late-night record shop.
- Call it impulsive, call it compulsive, call it insane;
- but when I'm surrounded I just can't sto
- Words & Music by Steven Page & Ed Robertson
- I tend the wheat field that makes your bread.
- I bind the sweet veal, pluck the hens that make your bed.
- Mother Nature & Mother Earth
- Are two of three women who dictate what I'm worth
- Chorus:
- I'm the farmer.
- I work in the fields all day.
- Don't mean to alarm her,
- But I know it was meant to be this way.
- You cried a tear, I wiped it dry
- I put you up upon a pedestal so high
- if you should waiver, if you should sway
- I'd catch you, spread my tiny wings and fly away.
- You signed your picture with an O and X
- I bet you don't write ";love"; each time you sign your cheques.
- Chorus
- All of this corn I grow I grow it all for you
- I took a hatchet to the radio I did it all for you
- You could have written back,
- You could have said ";Thank you";
- I guess you've got better things,
- better things to do.
- You say you love me, is that the truth?
- Although they've heard the songs, my friends want living proof.
- I know your address, I ring the bell
- I bring you flowers and a .22 with shells.
- I'm the farmer
- I work in the fields all day
- Never wanted to harm her
- But I know it was meant to be this way.
- Words & Music by Steven Page
- The bravest thing I've ever done
- Was to run away and hide
- But not this time, not this time
- And the weakest thing I've ever done
- Was to stay right by your side
- Just like this time, and every time
- I couldn't tell you I was happy when you were gone
- So I lied and said that I missed you when we were apart.
- I couldn't tell you, so I had to lead you on
- But I didn't mean to break your heart.
- And if I always seem distracted
- Like my minds somewhere else,
- That's because it's true, yes it's true
- it's this stupid pride that makes me feel
- Like I have to follow through
- Even half-assedly, loving you
- Why must I always speak in terms of cowardice?
- When I guess I should have just come out and told you right from the start
- Why must I always tell you all I want is this?
- I guess 'cause I didn't want to break your heart
- And you said;
- ";What'd you think that I was gonna do,
- Curl up and die just because of you?
- I'm not that weak, you know
- What'd you think that I was gonna do,
- Try to make you love me as much as I love you?
- how could you be so low?
- You arrogant man,
- What do you think that I am?
- My heart will be fine
- Just stop wasting my time";
- And now I know that you will be okay, and that I
- got what I want and that's rid of you
- Good bye
- And it's not cause I'll be missing you
- That makes me fall apart
- it's just that I didn't mean to break
- No I didn't mean to break
- No I didn't mean to break
- Your heart
- Words & Music by Steven Duffy & Steven Page
- The girl works at the store sweet Jane St. Clair
- Was dazzled by her smile while I shopped there
- it wasn't long before I lived with her
- I sang her songs while she dyed her hair
- Chorus:
- Jane, divided, but I can't decide what side I'm on
- Jane decided only cowards stay, while traitors run
- Jane, Jane
- I'd bring her gold and frankincense and myrrh
- She thought that I was making fun of her
- She made me feel I was fourteen again
- That's why she thinks it's cooler if we'd just stay friends
- Jane doesn't think a man could ever be faithful
- Jane isn't giving me a chance to be shameful
- Jane, Jane
- I wrote a letter, she should have got it yesterday
- That life could be better by being together
- is what I cannot explain to Jane
- The girl works at the store, sweet Jane St. Clair
- Was dazzled by her smile while I shoplift there
- No promises as vague as Heaven
- No Juliana next to my Evan
- Jane, desired by the people at the school and work
- Jane is tired, 'cause every man becomes a lovesick jerk
- Jane, Jane
- I look straight in the window, try not to look below
- Pretend I'm not up here, I try counting sheep
- The sheep seems to shower of this office tower
- It's Nine-point-eight straight down I can't stop my
- knees.
- Chorus:
- I wish I could fly
- From this building, from this wall
- And if I should try,
- would you catch me if I fall?
- My hands clench the squeegee, my secular rosary
- Hang on to your wallet, hang on to your rings
- I Can't look below me, or something might throw me
- I Curse at the windstorms that October brings.
- I look straight in the boardroom; a modern Pharaoh's tomb
- I'd gladly swap places, if they care to dive
- They're lined up at the window, peer down into limbo
- They're frightened of jumping, in case they survive.
- I wish I could step from this scaffold
- onto soft green pastures, shopping malls, or bed
- With my family and my pastor and my grandfather
- who's dead
- Look straight in the mirror, watch it come clearer
- I look like a painter, behind all the grease
- But paintings creating, and I'm just erasing
- A crystal-clear canvas is my masterpiece
- Chorus
- Words & Music by Steven Page & Ed Robertson
- Hello city ...
- Another night at the Palace 'cause there is nothing else to do.
- The same people, the same drinks and the same music, the same quicksand.
- I think this harbour town is waist deep and sinking fast.
- Chorus
- Hello city, you've found an enemy in me.
- Hello city, hello city.
- Second night at the Warehouse,
- and my mock turtleneck just reeks.
- From the liquor room to the changeroom,
- to the doom and gloom of the hotel room.
- I wish this seaside beerhall would sink into the bay.
- Chorus
- Maybe I caught you at a bad time.
- Maybe I should call you back next week.
- Maybe half the fault was mine that
- the sun didn't shine on Barrington Street.
- It's three o'clock in the morning,
- and I'm hungry so let's eat.
- Climb down three flights to the streetlights,
- and the bar-fights, we're just taking in the sights.
- I hope tomorrow that I wake up in my own bed.
- Chorus
- What a good place to be.. Don't believe them,'cause they speak a different language
- and it's never been happy for me.
- It's Happy Hour again.
- Hello city..Hello city..
- Words by Steven Page
- Music by Steven Page & Ed Robertson
- When I was born, they looked at me and said,
- ";What a good boy, what a smart boy, what a strong boy.";
- And when you were born, they looked at you and said,
- ";What a good girl, what a what a smart girl, what a pretty girl.";
- We've got these chains that hang around our necks
- people want to strangle us with them before we take our first breath.
- Afraid of change, afraid of staying the same,
- when temptation calls, we just look away.
- Chorus
- This name is the hairshirt I wear
- and this hairshirt is woven from your brown hair.
- This song is the cross that I bear,
- bear it with me, bear with me, bear with me, be with me tonight,
- I know that it isn't right, but be with me tonight.
- I go to school, I write exams,
- if I pass, if I fail, if I drop out,
- does anyone give a damn?
- And if they do, they'll soon forget 'cause it won't take much for me
- to show my life ain't over yet.
- I wake up scared, I wake up strange.
- I wake up wondering if anything in my life is ever going to change.
- I wake up scared, I wake up strange
- and everything around me stays the same.
- Chorus
- I couldn't tell you that I was wrong,
- chickened out, grabbed a pen and paper, sat down and I wrote this song.
- I couldn't tell you that you were right,
- so instead I looked in the mirror,
- watched TV, laid away all night.
- We've got these chains, hang 'round our necks,
- people want to strangle us with them before we take our first breath.
- Afraid of change, afraid of staying the same when temptation calls ...
- Chorus
- When I was born, they looked at me and said;
- ";What a good boy, what a smart boy, what a strong boy.";
- And when you were born, they looked at you and said;
- ";What a good girl, what a smart girl, what a pretty girl, hey";
- Words & Music by Steven Page & Ed Robertson
- Broke into the old apartment
- This is where we used to live
- Broken glass, broke and hungry
- broken hearts and broken bones
- This is where we used to live
- Why did you paint the walls?
- Why did you clean the floor?
- Why did you plaster over the hole I punched in the door?
- This is where we used to live
- Why did you keep the mousetrap?
- Why did you keep the dishrack?
- these things used to be mine
- I guess they still are, I want them back
- Broke into the old apartment
- Forty-two stairs from the street
- Crooked landing, crooked landlord
- Narrow laneway filled with crooks.
- This is where we used to live.
- Why did they pave the lawn?
- why did they change the locks?
- Why did I have to break it, I only came here to talk
- This is where we used to live
- How is the neighbor downstairs?
- How is her temper this year?
- I turned up your TV and stomped on the floor just for fun
- I know we don't live here anymore
- We bought an old house on the Danforth
- She loves me and her body keeps me warm
- I'm happy here
- But this is where we used to live
- Broke into the old apartment
- Tore the phone out of the wall
- Only memories, fading memories
- Blending into dull tableaux
- I want them back
- I want them back
- Words & Music by Steven Page & Ed Robertson
- When she was three
- Her barbies always did it on the first date
- Now she's with me,
- There's never any need for them to demonstrate
- She's like a baby, I'm like a cat;
- When we are happy, we both get fat and still
- it's never enough, it's never enough,
- it's never enough
- Chorus:
- But I don't tend to worry about the things that other people say,
- And I'm learning that I wouldn't want it any other way
- Call me crazy, but it really doesn't matter
- All that matters to me is she
- Her life, in a nutshell
- No way would she want it to change me
- it's not that easy 'cause
- My time is often decided for me
- For me
- She memorized every pencil crayon colour in the box
- Her blue-green eyes complement the burn sienna in her locks
- She's at the movies, I'm on the phone;
- When we're separated, we're never alone, but still
- it's never enough, it's never enough,
- No it's never enough
- Chorus
- I fell down
- With no one there to catch me from falling
- Then she came 'round
- And only her tenderness stopped me from bawling my eyes out
- I'm OK
- And that's why
- Her life, in a nutshell ...
- Words & Music by Ed Robertson
- A friend brought me flowers, she said they were lilacs
- But I've never been good with plants
- Her next presentation, a new dictionary
- She'd circled the word ";romance";
- So enthusiastic, a little bit drastic
- I shaved her name in my head
- And as she beheld it, she said I misspelled it;
- Need more be said!
- Chorus:
- These apples are delicious!
- ";As a matter of fact they are,"; she said
- Can all this fruit be free?
- She wrote me a letter as big as a phonebook
- I've never been big on mail
- I sent her a postcard from somewhere near Lethebridge
- And wondered if it still went by rail
- I've never been frightened of being enlightened
- But some things can go too far
- Though sometimes I stammer and mix up my grammar,
- You get what my meanings are
- Chorus
- I'm not trying to sing a love song -- I'm trying to sing in tune.
- I know I am sometimes headstrong
- Falling love, catching fire -- I want to be consumed
- Wondering will I ever tire, will I ever tire!
- Chorus
- If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
- I'd buy you a house (I would buy you a house)
- If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
- I'd buy you furniture for your house
- (Maybe a nice chesterfield or an ottoman)
- If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
- I'd buy you a K-Car (a nice Reliant automobile)
- If I Had $1000000 I'd buy your love.
- If I Had $1000000 I'd build a tree fort in our yard.
- If I Had $1000000 You could help, it wouldn't be that hard.
- If I Had $1000000 (Maybe we could put a little tiny fridge in there somwhere.)
- We could just go up and hang out. (Open the fridge and stuff. There would be
- food laid out for us, little pre-wrapped sausages and things.) Mmmm. (They have
- pre-wrapped sausages but they don't have pre-wrapped bacon.) Can you blame
- them? (Well, yeah!)
- If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
- I'd buy you a fur coat (but not a real fur coat that's cruel)
- If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
- I'd buy you an exotic pet (Like a llama or an emu)
- If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
- I'd buy you John Merrick's remains (ooh all them crazy elephant bones)
- If I Had $1000000 I'd buy your love
- If I Had $1000000 We wouldn't have to walk to the store
- If I Had $1000000 We'd take a limousine 'cause it costs more
- If I Had $1000000 We wouldn't have to eat Kraft Dinner.
- But we would eat Kraft Dinner. Well of course we would we'd just eat more. And
- buy all the fanciest ketchups for it...dijon ketchup! Mmmm..
- If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
- I'd buy you a green dress (but not a real green dress that's cruel)
- If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
- I'd buy you some art (a Picasso or a Garfunkel)
- If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
- I'd buy you a monkey (haven't you always wanted a monkey?)
- If I Had $1000000 I'd buy your love
- If I Had $1000000, If I Had $1000000
- If I Had $1000000, If I Had $1000000
- If I Had $1000000
- I'd be rich.
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